Know-Q-Out

These Animals are more Educated than 80% Indian Students

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Yes, you read it right. India has a Gross Enrollment Ratio in Higher Education Institutes around ~20%, says Deloitte. And these animals whether enrolled or not, have a bachelors, masters and in some cases Ph. D. degrees too – all offered by homo sapiens. Wonder how, wonder why? Read on.

Colby Nolan

Colby Nolan is a 2004 MBA graduate from Trinity Southern University, Dallas. Colby is a cat belonging to a deputy attorney general who enrolled his cat to expose Trinity Southern University for fraud. Some undercover agents had the then six-year-old Colby Nolan obtain a bachelor’s degree in business administration for $299. On the cat’s application, the agents claimed that the cat had previously taken courses at a community college, worked at a fast-food restaurant, babysat, and maintained a newspaper route. Then the school informed Colby that, due to the job experience listed on his application, he was eligible for an executive MBA for $100 more. The agents then sent for Colby’s transcript, which claimed that he had a GPA of 3.5. Trinity Southern only asked about Mr. Nolan’s work experience, awarding him an MBA based on his life’s experiences. The sting operation worked, the owners of Trinity were fined, the business was shut down and Colby became a 6 year old feline MBA.

George

Chris Jackson, presenter of Inside Out in the North East and Cumbria, registered pet  cat George with three industry bodies – British Board of Neuro Linguistic Programming (BBNLP), the United Fellowship of Hypnotherapists (UFH) and the Professional Hypnotherapy Practitioner Association (PHPA). Each one accepted a certificate from the non-existent Society of Certified Advanced Mind Therapists as proof of George’s credentials. The bodies in the US were not running checks on their members, these registrations entitled George to be considered a recognized hypnotherapist.  The UFH welcomed the Inside Out investigation and admitted the mistake, which it said has since been corrected.

Lulu

In a 2010 case BSky vs EDS in the US, a director of an EDS company had claimed in one of his witness statements that he was the holder of an MBA from “Concordia College St Johns 1995-1996”. When the lawyers of EDS checked out Concordia college online, they found that there was no such college and anyone could buy an MBS qualification online. Counsel for BSkyB took the entertaining step of acquiring one of these MBAs for his dog “Lulu” and was able to present Lulu’s MBA, including  a letter of recommendation to the court, thus destroying any credibility the witness might have had. Not surprisingly, Mr Galloway, who was sacked by EDS was found to be completely dishonest and a wholly unreliable witness whose evidence was given no credibility at all.

Peter Smith

The American University of London offered Pete, a four-year old male short-haired Lurcher in Battersea Dogs and Cats Home, London, an MBA for £4,500 without requiring any course work. The BBC current affairs program Newsnight reported in 2013 that the dog, named “Peter Smith” on the faked CV for a management consultant, was offered an MBA by the university’s Accreditation of Previous Experiential Learning board based on his “made-up work experience and a fictitious undergraduate degree” just four days after applying for the course.

Wally Brancato

In 2004, Almeda University, awarded an associate degree to Wally from Albany, N.Y. – a 7-year-old dog. …On Wally’s Almeda application, the dog’s owner, Peter Brancato, listed the canine’s “real world” experience as “playing with the kids every day” and “teaching them responsibilities like feeding the dog,” the Albany CBS affiliate reported in 2004. Wally’s childhood development degree came with a course list including college algebra and public speaking.